Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Snatched from the Pages of Cosmo

Because in writing and in life, stuff like this always catches my attention, when I came across this Cosmo piece online, I had to share it with you all. It's about how to decipher the cryptic code of Guy Speak. Some of these examples rang true for me when I read through them, others less so, but I'm fascinated by the ever-present subtext inherent in many male-female conversations...like, say, those little dialogues I think I'm having with my husband--LOL!

Anyway, take a peek and let me know what you think. Do any sound familiar? Got one or two that aren't listed here? (If you liked these, I found some more while reading through this quiz.)

1. He Says: "We should hang out sometime."
He Means: "I'm afraid you'll say 'no' if I ask you out."

2. He Says: "I'll call you later."
He Means: "I may or may not call you at some point between now and three months from now."

3. He Says: "My ex is crazy."
He Means: "I messed her up, and she got upset."

4. He Says: "That guy seems like a good friend of yours."
He Means: "Was there ever a thing between you?"

5. He Says: "It's a long story."
He Means: "It's a story that makes me look bad."

6. He Says: "That's a new look."
He Means: "You look weird."

7. He Says: "Why are you being so emotional?"
He Means: "Why are you acting like a psycho?"

8. He Says: "That's not what I meant."
He Means: "That's totally what I meant, but now that I see you're mad, I wish I hadn't said it out loud."

9. He Says: "It's fine."
He Means: "It's not actually fine, but I'm in no mood to discuss it."

10. He Says: "Can we talk about this later?"
He Means: "I never want to talk about this again."


Edie Ramer said...

Ha! I've had something similar to that "emotional" comment from my husband. I always suspected what he meant.

misa ramirez said...

This is SO funny! Love it!!!


Marilyn Brant said...

LOL, Edie! For me, #8's "That's not what I meant" sounded awfully familiar ;).

Misa, thanks! I'm glad it made you laugh today!!

Pamala Knight said...

LOL! Those are definitely chuckle-worthy AND SO TRUE!!. Thanks for sharing, Marilyn dear.

Marilyn Brant said...

Glad you liked 'em, Pamala! Men...they do give us women LOTS to talk about, don't they?! Hope the rest of your week is wonderful :).

Tonya Kappes said...

Seven and Ten is the ones that cracked me up! My husband BETTER not use those on me or I'll show him psycho:)
I love looking at all of those lists in magazines. Sometimes I cut them out b/c they make great dialogue sometimes.

Marilyn Brant said...

LOL, Tonya! I think they make great dialogues, too. As for #10, that one in particular makes me laugh because I'm hearing it already from my 11-year-old son ;).

Robin said...

Love those! Just like guys are always trying to figure us out, we often have to figure them out too. And then you've gotta laugh stuff off, because we are *so* different.

Pamela Cayne said...

I can tell your copyedits are over--you're reading Cosmo instead of pulling out your hair! Thanks for the Thursday laugh.

L.A. Mitchell said...

This list would have been handy at seventeen ;)

Marilyn Brant said...

Robin, I suspect we've spend FAR more time trying to figure out guys than the other way around, but I'd LOVE to listen in on one of their conversations where they're discussing how mystifying women are... ;)

Pam, I KNOW! I was actually hoping I'd find some hints in Cosmo for dealing with those remaining clumps of hair: some camouflaging hairstyle tips...hats, scarves and other accessories... But no, just quizzes--LOL.

L.A.--ha! It would've been, yes :).

LJCohen said...


I'm surrounded by testosterone between hubby and 2 teen age sons, so I'm pretty conversant in guy speak.


Marilyn Brant said...

Ha!! Well, Lisa, now I'll know who to go to when I need help interpreting! There are nights (like tonight, for example ;) when I'd love a translator in the house...

LJCohen said...

The trickiest for me is that if I ask "How do I look?" and hubby says "Fine".

*Sometimes* that means:

'You always look great, don't be stupid', and sometimes it means 'I really don't like what you're wearing but if I say anything I'm screwed.'


Marilyn Brant said...

LOL, Lisa!!
My mother-in-law warned me before I even married her son. She said, "Trust me. He won't notice anything new that you wear or if you get your hair cut. He just won't see it on his own..." Definitely turned out to be true! :)

Brittany Roshelle said...

That is so true! Lol!